


Canons are Never Good

by Ortholeine



Category: The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: Angst Free, Gen, for hedgi, happy fic, short but hopefully a little funny
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-12
Updated: 2016-05-12
Packaged: 2018-06-07 22:49:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,045
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6828328
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ortholeine/pseuds/Ortholeine
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Was talking with Hedgi on tumblr and decided to write a quick angst-free fic for her--one with happiness and no sadness at all. So maybe Barry, in high school, had a few wacky ideas about careers when he lost some motivation. And maybe Barry doesn't want it brought up in front of Cisco and Caitlin after what he considers to be a fantastic idea is shot down. Slightly crack.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Canons are Never Good

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Hedgi](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hedgi/gifts).



 

“Canons are never good,” Cisco said, his head tilted down in that _Are you serious? Because I’m very serious_ expression only he could pull off. Barry rolled his eyes, longs legs out in front of him as he pushed the chair a few inches each direction. Caitlin at her spot behind the computers just ignored them both, focusing on whatever it was she was working on.

“But what if there was some sort of, of, speed canon? Y’know, like what clowns are shot out of at the circus.”

Caitlin stopped her typing for a second and her eyes narrowed at the boys in front of her—not quite glaring, but that special Caitlin exclusive mom-esque look.

“No. Canons,” she said very slowly.

Barry’s eyes kind of widened and he sighed, looking almost like a puppy as he stared somewhat dejectedly at the floor.

Footsteps proceeded Joe’s voice as he spoke.

“I’ve got some news and—what’s with the long face?”

Barry just sighed again as Caitlin turned the to face the detective standing the corner of the desk.

“Barry’s just upset we told him no speed canon.”

Joe’s eyebrows went up and he stared at Barry as if there were something he knew about the speedster they didn’t.

“A speed canon? Really Barry?”

Cisco looked between them as if there were an invisible tennis match going on.

“Wait, is there something you know you’re not telling us?”

Joe glanced at Cisco before looking at his watch.

“A couple things, yeah. Some you’d like to hear. But first Iris is waiting for us—dinner’s ready.”

 

* * *

 

 

 

The five of them sat at the West’s dining table, laughing at some sort of joke that had Barry grinning and Cisco pouting. Iris’ eyes flit back and forth between Barry and the others, but her smile never wavered, her expression never turned thoughtful. It wasn’t until Barry’s chuckling subsided that Cisco remembered something. He turned to Caitlin and grinned, trying to telepathically nudge her. She stared at him, not bothering to hide her confusion.

“What’s wrong, Cisco?” Joe said, something not quite worry but not happy like before on his face. Cisco sighed forcefully and tilted his head.

“C’mon Caitlin, you remember. Joe had some dirt on Barry he was gonna tell us?”

Caitlin’s eyes changed and while Iris prepared herself for whatever reprimand she was about to need to give to her foster brother-friend-thing, Barry groaned.

“Ah guys, come on. There’s no need to bring that back up.”

Joe pointed at him, his elbow coming up to rest on the table.

“Oh no, I think there is a need.”

The father turned to his daughter, starting to laugh as he spoke, and kind of bobbed his head a bit.

“You remember Barry’s freshman year of high school? What he wanted to drop out and do for about a month?”

Iris’ eyes lit up and whatever reprimand she had been mentally preparing was gone as she grinned. Caitlin recognized it as something to look forward too—Cisco on the other hand began to wonder just what he had unleashed on his friend.

“I remember. Something to do with the circus. Want to them, Barry, or should I?”

Barry groaned again and starting to blush as he sat up, throwing his napkin on the table.

“It’s silly really, it’s nothing. I-I-I just wanted thought that the circus was cool and would be easier than dealing with the regular pains of public school. It was standardized testing month; you know how that is.”

Cisco pursed his lips and shifted his body in Ultimate Sass Form.

“Uh-huh. And you wanted to do what job in the circus for an entire month?”

Barry sighed and mumbled something into the fist now at his mouth.

Caitlin leaned closer, not bothering to try and hide her evil glee.

“What was that Barry?”

He didn’t say anything and looked, trying to plead with each individual person at the table. His eyes lingered a little longer on Iris’ but he couldn’t ignore Joe’s laughter that was growing louder by the moment.

“Fine, find. I wanted to be a cotton-candy maker. I thought it would be a nice happy change and I researched a bit about it.”

Iris scoffed, taking a sip of water.

“Obsessed over it is more like it. I remembered him trying to find posters once.”

“Dude,” Cisco groaned into his fist, patting Barry on the shoulder with an ear-to-ear grin. “Cotton-candy?”

Barry slumped back in his chair and tried to endure the teasing.

“I bet there’s not that many famous cotton-candy makers, are there?” Caitlin teased, smiling in a way she hadn’t quite smiled since the Singularity.

“Okay, okay, I know I get it,” Barry said with a smile. “It was dumb and weird and yes, I was a little obsessed with it, but nothing major.”

Everyone finished their last few comments and laughs, Cisco trying out a few puns and trying to not imagine what would happen if an evil murderous clown had been turned into a meta, when Iris spoke up again.

“Wait, why did this come up at all? What does the circus and Barry have to do with something at STAR Labs?”

Barry’s eyes widened in a special kind of panic reserved for Iris and Cisco tried to become a little smaller in his seat.

“Um, nothing,” Barry quickly said.

Joe raised an eyebrow at him and turned to Caitlin who was already opening her mouth to speak.

“Barry and Cisco were debating about making a speed canon—one for a person like some circus performers shoot out from.”

As the various scenarios that sort of contraption could put them all in, specifically Barry, they all watched as Iris’ face turned morphed into something Cisco had secretly dubbed the Abort Immediately face: Caitlin had one just like it, and it often led to scoldings the world had never seen before. Scoldings that burn his ears off, and forced Barry to shake, just a little. He was just grateful he and Barry had thrown away the preliminary schematics the speedster had drawn up in the few extra minutes they had before eating dinner.

Joe just sat back in his chair, slowly rubbing his hands together in anticipation for the show of fireworks.

**Author's Note:**

> I know they might be a bit OOC, and that it really isn't as funny as I'd like to think it is, but I've wanted to write something for Hedgi for a while and this was my first time writing something not focused on a ship, or with any romance at all really.


End file.
